Subtitle: Facebook has struck again!
A friend from way back, David, resurfaced a few years ago on Facebook. We had kinda dated back in the day but at the time, my mom was dying so there really wasn't much enthusiasm for a relationship on my part but he was fun to go out and do things with to get away from what was going on at home.
Over the last 11 years, we parted ways only to remain in contact via email and that was really not much contact but the lines of communication were there (i.e., our two email accounts). About 2 years ago, he got a Facebook page and somehow found me so we've been Facebook friends. We finally met up for the first time in 11 years last month and had a late lunch and did some Christmas shopping. It was fun and since then, I've been tagging along with him on his mortgage appraisal jobs as a sidekick - taking pictures of comparable houses if they were on my side of the road, gettign him to these houses, etc. I've had a blast.
A few weeks back, he and I decided to get tickets for a roller derby match in Detroit this upcoming Saturday. However, since then, he has began seeing someone and has told her that this weekend he is having a 'boys night out'. She has no idea that he has a friend named Murf. He has also warned me to not tag him in any photos from our evening out (who goes to a roller derby and NOT take pictures?) because she will see it. Keep in mind that through all of this, Big A has known where I am and who I am out with and is fine with it all. I can't help but feel like David is ashamed to know me and I feel like I was just "filler" until someone better came along...but then I reflect on pre-Facebook days. Back then, I would take pictures of us and send them to him or print and give them to him. There was no need to "worry" about pictures being seen by the wrong people.
I've currently reached my 'David' limit. I just have nothing left to say to him, no urge to reply to his last email as the idiot tries to find the photo of me in which my scarf was tagged as him.
What does a girl in a Facebook world do? Am I making a big deal out of something that isn't? If I am, how can I still overcome the residual feeling of him being ashamed to know me then?
10 comments:
Being a)male and b)not on Facebook makes it difficult for me to answer your query. Yet, I shall give it the college try.
My guess, is that David is worried his new GF will get the wrong idea and think he's cheating on her. Thus, he fears having to either explain your existence or his own lies.
The silver lining to this, though, is that he's told you about his GF. This means, he's probably not trying to rekindle the flame of bygone years, especially since tangling with someone denominated "Big A" sounds unpleasant.
Now, for my next trick, I shall help you pick out a new clutch and delightful pair of heels.
Cheers.
I think it is time to ditch Facebook and go back to living anonymously. It is so much easier that way.
R - You have burgundy shoes. I am not letting you pick out any of my clothes and/or accessories. :-)
Ed - In many, many ways, pre-
Facebook did seem like a simpler time.
So I came a conclusion on my own after I posted this which is...not give Facebook all of this power and if he wants to tell her about me, he can. If not, that's his decision. I realized that pre-Facebook, photos were sent via email or printed and then given to the person, not published for the world to see just to prove that you do have a life. Once I thought of it in that context, it helped. I think I can continue hanging out with him. Besides, I have a bunch of mortgage appraisal stories bubbling, awaiting to come out in a blog entry! :-)
I cannot believe you've never heard of burgandy wing tips. Classic style. Buy some for Big A.
I don't think he's ashamed of you. I think he's worried what she's going to think.
And he should be. HE LIED TO HER.
He should have just told her the truth, and none of this would be an issue.
But yeah, I think I'd be over David, too.
I think I might have met this David when I came out for your mom's funeral. And I remember at the time thinking that I liked Big A better even though David seemed very nice. He should have just been truthful right out of the gate with the new relationship. I don't really understand the lying part. Then the Facebook tags wouldn't have been an issue.
And though I would love to see your pictures of Roller Derby, it won't be enough to make me join Facebook! Stacia :^)
Yup, that would be him of course the ZZ Top-like beard is somewhat memorable...as was him sitting there by himself, crying. I really don't get it either but I guess that's his issue when/if she should find out.
For you, S, I will send the photos to you old school - via email. Sunday night is something that sounds even as much fun - Folk The Police. It's a concert of people covering rap songs but sung like a folk song. I can't not laugh even just thinking about it. You should move back. ;-)
No one is talking about the real issue here--Roller Derby. Murf, I thought you were going to be on skates... I'd lose respect and interest in anyone who invite me to roller derby...
from the man with 2 pair of burgurdy shoes--one wingtips
Is there going to be a post about roller derby?
I don't see the sound of "roller skates"...have you forgotten?
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